Sunday, October 31, 2010

"Live Like You Were Dying"

Just to clarify the following is from a blog I follow, but a really powerful post.



You all know the words, "I went sky diving, rocky mountain climbing...."
Truly good enough song and yet one I think we tend to not THINK about a lot, the words become so familiar.
The church here is doing a 4-5 week series on "Live Like You Were Dying" you know -
Speak Sweeter
Love Deeper
Give Forgiveness You've Been Denying
All good by the way, all things we (well I anyway) should give more to on a more consistent basis, I'm not discounting those at all.
But this is more personal to me...I don't often take to my "soap box" (probably best for you all) but this has been on my heart.
You see, as I have been going through pictures to find the perfect ones for John's 40th birthday gift/scrapbook I have come across some pictures that have become so much more dear to me this year, they are the pictures of times spent with my Grandmother. Every time I crunch through the fall leaves I think about and miss her.
This time of year, "fall" and "The Blue Ridge Parkway" go hand-in-hand, I think you cannot truly have one without the other. Inevitably, when talk that leads to mention of Maybury Mill. Those two words bring to mind a VIVID image that I think will forever be ingrained in my mind's eye, of a family of four, my high school/college friend and her husband and their two children...so many sweet memories. They are gone, all of them......
As I nursed my sweet baby boy to sleep tonight (yes I still do that) my aunt and uncle are at a Children's Hospital holding their precious one month old son, the child they have desperately wanted for so long. And unless God works a miracle, sweet little Colton will soon be in Jesus arms.
I just learned of a mother of 7 young children who just learned that her body is full of cancer, that short of a miraculous healing, she has a 10% chance of living 5 more years.
Has hard as these are, and I know you all have your own stories and certainly these are heavy on my heart these days...this isn't intended to be a "downer" I don't wish to depress anyone. In fact, the joy of each of these, my Grandmother is enjoying the reward she lived for her whole life, enjoying the beauty of heaven that we cannot even fathom.
Likewise, Tricia knows the joy of experiencing heaven with her family, her children are in heaven with her and what greater joy can a mother know?
Sweet little Colton has been through so much in this one short month, the promise of no suffering comforts the aching heart, so this isn't truly SAD (at least not entirely, though I admit I am crying as I write).
But this makes me ask what DOES it mean to "Live like you were dying"? The question has been repeated at church, "what if you knew you only had 30 days to live" what would you do differently?
This I know, if I had 30 days to live.... I would make and document a ZILLION fun memories for my little boy. I would stop what I was doing to read that book that Wyatt pushes into my hand, even if it IS the 10th time this morning. I wouldn't regret a one of the cars I pushed across the floor. I would engage in more play that caused my little boy to giggle uncontrollably and shriek in delight.
I would take the time to listen, truly listen to the things that were important to my husband, to make him FEEL his importance in my life. I would be more patient of our differences.
There is a line in the song that says "all of a sudden goin' fishin' wasn't such an imposition" and I wonder, what "impositions" in my life would be more "blessing" with a perspective change. I will be honest, when a HUGE dirty diaper (I mean the scrubbing the clothes out, gotta get in the tub kind of dirty diaper) delays the "special birthday dinner" it is REALLY easy to forget how many mommies would give anything for that dirty diaper, it is far easier to feel "poor me, why me..." (I know but I'm just being honest and surely I'm not the only one).
So what does this have to do with you? Maybe nothing, maybe this is entirely for me, maybe just a "creative writing" exercise God has put on my heart to help me (and goodness knows I need it several times a day). In which case, forgive me need for some self introspection, and pray for me that I may truly have a perspective change.
But I ask you to consider this ---
What if you knew tomorrow or the next day was your last...or your loved ones last what would be truly IMPORTANT
What legacy are you leaving behind, what will you be remembered for (it won't likely be the big things so much as the small way you lived your life)
What are your "impositions"... are they really?
Do you have the reassurance that what's to come is better, that you have accepted God's salvation and forgiveness that you continue to walk in an obedient, relationship with Him...are you leaving a clear path that points toward God, for those who will follow behind you?
What does it look like to "live like you were dying?"

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